Introduction

A few years ago, my husband flew to Africa to run a 90klm ultra marathon. I wished him well!

Africa

My sweetie's going to Africa
He leaves on Friday night
I've told him…have a real good time
As he prepares for flight
I'll be alright!

As he packs the floral suitcase
I'm not worried, not a bit
There's no harm that can befall him
In fact, I'm certain of it
For he's quite fit

He could beat a rhinoceros
If it wouldn't let him past
And if a lion had a go
I know it would be her last
He's very fast

My sweetie's going to Africa
But he refused to have his shots
The doctor said just don't get bit
Put repellent on your exposed spots
So I've packed lots

He's going for a run you know
An ultra marathon
For 90 k's he'll do his best
With the guys in the 'middle' echelon
In his nylons

I'm sure he'll make it to the end
He's been practising for some time
Up and down Maleny's hills
Before our breakfast time
He's in his prime

My sweetie's going to Africa
With the boys, he'll have a ball
From Johannesburg to Durban
Visiting parks and waterfalls
Until nightfall

He's worried about the violence
And the tourists are prime hits
So he'll just stay inside his room
And avoid the nasty bits
Like armed bandits

No I won't worry about my sweetie
As I sit here on the farm
There's nothing over in Africa
That would set off my alarm
Or cause him harm

As long as he stays off the streets
And when he's out on tour
He keeps the first-aid kit real close
And the anti-venom cure
Can't be too sure

And I've heard that hippopotamus'
Can attack a big canoe
I'd rather it be someone else
Than my sweetie he bit in two
Oh no not you

And what about those Zulu men
With spears and poison darts
They aim them at your vulnerable bits
And those are my most favourite parts
Like your big…heart

And what about the cannibals
Who carve you into bits
And throw you into a steaming pot
With herbs and spice and grits
Oh it's the pits

The stinging bush, the flying wasp
The worm that grows inside
The voodoo spells, the demon chants
My sweetie you must hide
Just stay inside

My sweetie's going to Africa
He's really scared I know
You can see I'm feeling quite OK
But there's something I need to ask you though
Sweetie…do you have to go?

Copyright; Arcadia Flynn
Email: funnypoets@yahoo.com
Web Site: http://www.funnypoets.com