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Introduction
I
was going back to a family reunion; a very religious group they were....I
am the black sheep of the family....I knew I would be asked to say grace...so
I wrote this beforehand. With great somberness I began reading this poem,...I
saw a few closed eyes pop open, then a chuckle or two, then some outright
laughing...by the fourth couplet I had 'em totally forgetting what we
were supposed to be doing......( Mission accomplished)
Hypochondriac's
Grace
Dear
Lord, we ask you if you will,
put
your blessing on this meal.
We
ask you Father, if it pleases,
protect
us from these new diseases.
Please
bless the spinach, and the romaine.
And
cleanse it of some lurking ptomaine.
God,
bless our ice cream and our cola.
Pray
it's not teaming with ebola.
And
pray the deli didn't sell us
coleslaw
ripe with salmonellus.
We
also ask a special blessing;
no
botulism in the dressing.
While
we regard your higher power,
make
sure the deviled eggs aren't sour.
And
please Lord, bless our sirloin tip,
and
purge it of E. Coli's grip.
A
special blessing on the sherry,
oh
Lord, we need no dysentery,
so
it not poisons, nor impacts,
or
liquefies our lower tracts.
And
Lord, make sure no one is able
to
get sick and die upon this table.
So
bless, Lord, all this food we share.
Insure
no deadly virus there.
And
once we're full and satiated,
we
pray we aren't all contaminated,
and
wind up just another toll,
for
the Center for Disease Control.
One
last thing Lord, if it's OK,
Please
hold this blessing that we pray.
For
all this fear, and all this fright,
has
made us lose our appetite.
***Amen***
Copyright;
Fred
Moore
Email:
fjmoore@hotmail.com
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