Country/Location
Specific Poems

 

Country/Location Specific Poems

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A Flat in BudapestBen Mousley

My father has recently given me the keys to the family flat in Budapest, Hungary. I sent him this poem to show my appreciation...

A Little Off, We Merkins Are Darby O'Grady

Americans have so little time to work!

Africa Arcadia Flynn

My sweetie's going to Africa He leaves on Friday night I've told him…have a real good time As he prepares for flight I'll be alright! ....

Albert and The Morris Dancers Peter Booker

The continuing story of young Albert Ramsbottom and some people he met on a trip to Blackpool.

And Murphy Raised His Head Helen Iles

There's a saying said when things go wrong, and go wrong more and more, It's said the most by fatalists - they call it 'Murphy's Law'.

Anthem of FrustrationEvan Elpus

You've rung the Melbourne offices of No-One's Ever Here; Please leave your name and number and then kindly disappear.

A Scotsman's View of L.U. Gordon Taylor

London Undergound, famous for its overcrowding, its delays and its breakdowns. As a Scot living and working in the English capital, to me it's one of the things that most make me yearn for the clean skies of home.

A Thong's Song Bridh Hancock

You cop no chop when you're a thong; No great deeds done and no great song. Is sung as you flip-flop along, Just another cheapo thong.

Australia Day Plea Evan Elpus

I've just seen 'Pride and Prejudice', but feel no great compunction To swan around a vicarage, with tea and cakes for luncheon; Though buying oil from Saudis, we decline to put their robes on, And as for German influence - do you wear lederhosen? ...

Changing The FlagPat Cannard

I submitted this to a radio competition in response to a request for limericks about the flag.

City Wallys and Flat Hats Roger Harcourt

A bit of light hearted fun poked at city slickers posing as bushies...

Cloggin' Matilda Pete(r) Booker

The original version of "Waltzing Matilda"!!!

Danger in the Wet Mr. A. Non

Some people in North Queensland (Australia) love having tourists visit them so much, that they tell them this tale...

Drizabone Graham Fredriksen

As my heart sings a country song, I brave the yearly August throng, with pioneering instincts strong to where the bushmen are; ...

Ex Tex Tad Lawson

I used to live in Texas Why don't I now, you wonder? Well now I guess I must confess I made a fatal blunder.

First Rejoinder to The Gay Farmhand Alan Weinstein

I'm deeply offended , I'm shaking with rage. You've published 'Gay Farmhand', despite the 'New Age'

Floraholica Pam Harris

When it's all said 'n done, with yer life nearly gone, and on thinkin' yer past mistakes over, Tho' drinkin's no sin, it's what y'pour in, and I think I would rather stay sober.

Foot in Mouth Disease Rob Spence

All us Aussies knew the Poms had this disease all the time!

Forgiveness For Christopher Pat Cannard

You leave him alone you fat lazy tart

Four be TwoIan Mackay

Young Paddy worked as a builder's lad, He was a bit simple ..... and everyone knew; ......

G'day Cobber! Amin Sane

G'day cobber Bill's the name How 'ya goin mate I had to run to catch this bus Strewth i can't be late.......

Groundhog Daze Pamela Dow

A Pa. town is keeping a secret about one of our country's National Icons! How long have we as Americans been kept in the dark? Read about how, on that fateful day in February, their nasty little secret suddenly becomes exposed!

How Paddy Stole The Rope Author Unknown

There was once two Irish labouring men; to England they came over; They tramped about in search of work from Liverpool to Dover.

I Hope Yer Sheep Get Flyblown Janine Haig Eulo Q.

So you're the mob got all the rain while we got hardly none; The clouds massed over your place and left us with the sun. Your bit of sky grew darker, while we just got the heat -

It's GREAT Being British! Paul Bearer

A nationality crisis.

It's Not Too Different Robert Oxford

It's not too different ... way down here The sun's a bit hotter ... It's a good drop 'o beer It's not too way out ... in a strange sort of way ...

Labels of Babel David Hallett

there's hippies & yuppies & greenies and hippies & yuppies & greenies... and hippies & yuppies & greenies & Kooris & junkies & drinkies, ...

Lake Elisa Don Johnson

One of the strange people I met......

MabelStephen Corless

My wife Mabel has a confession to make about our ten kids and her infidelity. Written in Lancahire dialect (Lanky speak)

Migosh It's 'ot Henderson Q. Goldfischer

Aussies are tried 'n true yarn spinners, even the best of 'em can get their comeuppance.

My Words Harry Butler

I have often wondered why English writers follow American spellings.

Ode To A Beaut Sheila Noel Free

The Aussie male as a romantic? You be the judge.

Ode To A Missouri Mule Fred Moore

Have you ever plowed with a mule, especially one that should have been an extra in " The Exorcist" .......well I have.....and I just barely lived to tell about it. A coutry boy's tale of barnyard horror!!!

Rabbie Burns Day Author Unknown

Tony Blair is being shown around an Edinburgh hospital....

Road Works Ahead! Stanley Brown

What can I do with 'Enry?

Scotland (Ex Top Ten) Arcadia Flynn

I want to go to Scotland I want to find a man with hairy legs and chest and face no blond, blue eyes and tan with muscles on his muscles a strapping kind of lad with kilt and great big sporran that would make me glad! ....

Scottish Breakfast Peter Holzworth

Black Pudding With Haggis and Egg, ...

Skasey Of the Overdraft (Ex Top Ten) Author Unknown

They had issued him a warrant which they had in light of current Knowledge, sent to where he's holed up in Majorca on his arse, He was fleeing from a debt, about the size of the alphabet So Vanstone got in touch with 'Skasey, of The Overdraft'...

Spellchequed Henderson Q. Goldfischer

There is nothing like the English language to not only confuse our enemies but we Anglophones as well...and that, my friends includeth, the nephews and nieces of Uncle Sam.

Spring Has Sprung Doug Miles

A topical poem (submitted in spring, anyway) about the "dark side" of many people's favourite season.

Terrors Of A Country Town Leighton B Watts

Well you might think that travelling in the bush is the way to go But there's pros and cons in everything and there's something you should know...

The Barber From Hell Neil McArthur

When I walked into the Barber Shop, the Barber was a different gent I saw the sign on the wall which read "Under New Management"...

The Battle Of Hastings Marriott Edgar

I'll tell of the Battle of Hastings, As happened in days long gone by, When Duke William became King of England, And 'arold got shot in the eye. ...

The Bronze Aussie MaleGraham Fredriksen

He's standing there with pie and sauce And dribbling in a Four-X beer, His beer-gut is on show of course, He relives days out hunting deer ...

The Coo an the Peacock Author Unknown

Here is a Doric poem. This is the dialect that used to be spoken in Aberdeenshire.

The Damper (Ex Top Ten) Mark Feldman

Having been a keen bush cook for many a long day when camped out up in the mountains or wherever the swag may be rolled, it was proba-bly almost inevitable that a poem would be written about that most wondrous of Aussie tucker, the damper.

The Doctor's Sorry Tale David Clements

Doctor Foster went to Gloucester in a shower of rain, He didn't want to go there but got hooked up by a crane! ...

The Godfather Wally (The Bear) Finch

An Italian family that lives near me had a welcome addition to their family And for miles around with vino and grins happy folk celebrated the birth of twins. ...

The Holy Horse Augustus Venselaar

A bushranger was in need of a fast horse. Normally he would have stolen one of course. But this time he heard about a really fast thoroughbred. Which was owned by a minister of the church instead. ...

The Seaside Rag A.B. Chipper

Our land-sharks are all Greenies, Our kids don't run amuck, We print no tales of fire or flood, They hurt the tourist buck

The View From the Loo Tad Lawson

Though England and America Are so together hung It's often said we're separated By a common tongue.

Type O' Pype Dirge sterl'

I reckon it'd go down well, even at the Glasgow Empire, cos it relates to a time when they didn't so much make bagpipes as catch 'em.

Welcome to Roswell Jack Smith

I wonder if aliens ever take vacations or holidays?

Whale Of A Tale Nadia Simpson

Bobbing along in my boat on the bay, Enjoying a beautiful, nautical day, When just about to hoist the sail, I came face to face with a very large whale....

Visiting My GranDustnomi

We would lie there with the candle flickering, making shadows and shapes on the wall and we'd play at trying to find faces on the damp patches that we saw.

Yorkshire Pudden Weston and Lee

Hi waitress, excuse me a minute, now listen, I'm not finding fault, but here, Miss, The 'taters look gradely... the beef is a'reet, But what kind of pudden is this? ...

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