Now I lay me down to sleep...

Albert Brown was a naval man Of proud but lowly rank. ....

The appeal of nose-picking whilst bored...

A wonderful horn the Kazoo......

Some motherly advice from history for my daughter.

I found these words of wisdom, Inscribed on a dunny wall; Put there with a firmish hand... "God made MAN first of all." ...

Hot and Spicy Very nicey....

I wrote this poem in 1991 for a friend's small daughter. Here in England, a kipper is a salted herring and a very popular fish to eat, especially for breakfast.

I thought I'd sit and write a ditty Full of charm and rather witty Then tragedy! - this is no rumour....

I'm Pedro the paranoid pirhanna, and I don't think that I'll see manyana,'cos some o' me mates, want me on their plates -

I think most modern art is mostly fraud ......

When I was a little boy Snuggled safe in bed They said I should play with my soldiers..

I got distressed that my contest now met with jest so to the west I flung with zest my brand new vest.

Black Pudding With Haggis and Egg, ...

My younger friends can hurt me ......

Now I'm old and feeble, And my pilot light is out, What used to be my sex appeal Is now my water spout...

A strange bird ...

A tooter who tooted a flute tried to tutor two tooters to toot.

Tim, the insane inventor, Created a woman, but bent her.......

One fine summers day in mid winter I set off for a walk at a run .........

Vic the vagrant wasn't fragrant but he didn't care...

To blow a fart Is good for the heart....

I think most modern art is mostly fraud ......