Drinking Poems


Drinking Poems

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A Boozer's Tale Steve Morris

I never drink beer on a Monday, Cos Monday's the day fer mi health ....

A Drinking Problem Bernie Kyle

Booze has its problems!

Charlie's Patch Patricia Markey

Charlie and Fred had been shearing sheep, till the shed cut out last week, So they stopped at the pub for a beer or two, You know how it goes, oh I'm sure you do,....

Cop This (Ex Top Ten) Brian Bell

The booze bus was out on a traffic attack. One driver was clear, till a spirited cop, having noticed some knives on the seat in the back, said "These are the weapons we're trying to stop!"

Crown Jewels Bernard Shaw

Singing God Save The Queen.

Dee Dubble-Yoo Eye Mary Sullivan

So you think you're unlucky, huh?

Discusion Neil O'Hara-Smith

Massive, impassive....and I knocked over his drink...

Drinking When He's At The Lake Margaret Shurtleff

A twist on the traditional "he's fishing at the lake getting drunk again" I'm not standing for it!

Floraholica Pam Harris

When it's all said 'n done, with yer life nearly gone, and on thinkin' yer past mistakes over, Tho' drinkin's no sin, it's what y'pour in, and I think I would rather stay sober.

Goats Kathleen Thorpe

Trotting through the dusk on that deserted country lane, a sight I'd never seen before - nor never will again....

Have Some Madeira M'Dear Flanders and Swann

She was young, she was pure, she was new, she was nice, She was fair, she was sweet seventeen. He was old, he was vile, and no stranger to vice,....

Love Came Cautiously S. Sorrensen

like, at first, I tried not to notice her she was lovely, lovable, loved everybody loved her I didn't want to notice her ....

Mulligan's Missus (Ex Top Ten) Neil McArthur

Mulligan's missus was big, fat and mean A cruel and ugly man-killing machine She's the type of woman you'd be looking for If you wanted mercenaries for a guerilla war

Piston --- Broke (Ex Top Ten) Ron Selby

He walked into a bar, sat his frame upon a stool, Said to the barman, "Just give me anything that's cool! I'll have a Scotch, a Rum, a double Gin and a quart of beer...

She Stole My Heart Wally (The Bear) Finch

I saw her in a crowded bar I worshipped her from afar Her rose tattoo with a star...

Sotally Tober (Ex Top Ten) David Hudgins

Starkle starkle little twink who the heck you are I think ...

The Beer Prayer (Ex Top Ten) Ted Guhl

Our lager, Which art in barrels, Hallowed be thy drink.

The Boy's Prayer Author Unknown

Our beer Which art in bottles Hallowed be thy sport ...

The Face Jane Cox

When I woke up this morning......

The Fisherman Of Mordialloc Creek Fred Curtis

Old Charlie liked his fishing near as much As quaffing beer and swapping yarns and such And telling tales of fish that got away And fish that he will catch some other day.

The Function! Amin Sane

The demon alcohol can strike at any time, even when we'd rather it didn't.

The Good Sport Fred Curtis

A shame it was about old Bert, they said, A drinking man, a sport, a thoroughbred; He' d never meant ill to beast nor mankind And seldom would utter a word unkind....

The Irish Pig Mr A. Non

.'Twas an evening in November, As I very well remember, I was strolling down the street in drunken pride, ...

The Jackpot at the Pub Tom Hampstead

The pub's promotion caters for everyone and characters shine as expectation grips them.

The 'Most 'Popular 'Bloke In The 'Pub Neil McArthur

The Abattoir was closing, the management went broke So redundancies were handed out to each and every bloke ....

The Scotsman Author Unknown

Well, a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar one evening fair, And one could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share.

The Truth About Drink Driving (Ex Top Ten) Ian Mackay

I read this in the paper, And it really made me think; That a quarter of all road accidents Can be blamed... directly... on drink. ...

Under The Affluence of Incohol David Peetz

You know, once your words start to slur, beer and metaphors don't mix.

Waitin' Coffee Man Joe

A poem written on a napkin composed in a cafe'

Your Shout Mark Both

God, I love alcohol. Every Friday night, Me and the boys hit the town, And drink 'em up till we fall down. God, I love alcohol, I swill it on my gums, ..

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