Health Poems


Health Poems

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A Case Of Nasopharyngitis Stringybark

This sorry tale of how good health can lead a man to strife, Was told by one who'd never had a crook day in his life.

Breathless MasterRevelation

I'm not too fit, I'll have you know I'm overweight and rather slow ....

Conversation Piece Joe Pamanian

Have you ever noticed that when you lose a filling it is always after surgery hours.

Dental Disasters Keith Allibone

Have you ever noticed that when you lose a filling it is always after surgery hours.

Dragonitis Hideous Monster

He travelled from the caves And told this news to all the town. He said that he would surely die, If its cure could not be found.

EXERCISE! Dusty Tincher

A rhyming spoof about what the dreaded 'E' word did NOT do for yours truly! LOL!

Failing Health (Ex Top Ten) Brian Bell

I heard about an older, widowed lady. This energetic woman loved to dance but underneath her rapture something shady had sought the Doctor, such was circumstance.

How Am I You Ask?Donna Vickodil

'll be fine when I lose a few hundred pounds and my cough isn't really as bad as it sounds....

Hypochondriac's Grace (Ex Top Ten) Fred Moore

How does a health obsessed person say grace at the table? Considering all the new fangled microbes invading our world....try this....

I'm A Lovely Couple (Ex Top Ten) Tad Lawson

If I am schizophrenic, it's a trial I can weather... I'm in the best of company when I'm alone together.

I'm Fine, Thank YOU Author Unknown

There is nothing the matter with me. I'm as healthy as I can be. I have arthritis in both my knees And when I talk, I talk with a wheeze.

Intestinal Fortitude Maggie Lauer

When I itch for you and hunger so from yearning, you're like Preparation H to soothe the burning...

Itís Somethiní In Me Genes iCharlee Marshal

I wuz down in Brisbane Fridíy week aní went ter see the quack... I reckon it wuz time to take it easy; I donít want you people thinkiní Iím a hy-pro-chon-diac But jusí lately I bin feeliní kinda queasy;....

Jesus The Healer Brian Bell

The Lord looked down upon the world and saw things weren't too good. His word had been forgotten or at best misunderstood. ...

Last DragSandy

They'll stunt your growth, your breath will humm like the air expelled from Satans' bum ...

My Little Purple Pills The Larriken

I take my little purple pills each morning and each night. My Doctor says I need them and he thinks that he is right. ....

Ode To The Mammogram Author Unknown

For several years they've told me, "Be careful of your breasts. Don't ever bruise or hurt them, And give them monthly tests." ...

Outing the Bug! MasterRevelation

When I found myself in hospital having contracted Necrotising Fasciitis (Necrotizing Fasciitis to you US friends) I decided to let rip at it!

Piston --- Broke (Ex Top Ten) Ron Selpy

He walked into a bar, sat his frame upon a stool, Said to the barman, "Just give me anything that's cool! I'll have a Scotch, a Rum, a double Gin and a quart of beer...

Psychodrama Stephen Cree

The doctor's certificate certified that my brain was a splutjabbing mess...

Sore Lips Tony Parry

It happened back in Cammoweal in nineteen fifty three, When having a beer in the bottom pub, was the little town's G.P. ....

Tennis Trouble David J O'Sullivan

Tennis never was my sport, But I love to watch them playing; Swinging hard an arm and racquet, Such natural skills displaying....

The Cow Creek Lady's First Aid Club (Ex Top Ten) Neil McArthur

.The ladies of Cow Creek decided they should learn First aid Since Mrs. Johnson's Husband cut his foot off with a spade She saw the poor old bugger fall and thought it was his heart Then killed him jumping on his chest, trying to make it start ...

The Great Bath Disaster MasterRevelation

How to flood a hospital ward without trying...

The Mammagram (Ex Top Ten) Shirley Friend

I was booked to have a mammogram, on a bus that comes around. I waited ten minutes at the stop outside the football ground....

The Neurologist Janette Tickner

This is based on a true story - which is kind of scary ! - about a neurologist I once visited.

The Pap Smear Jacqueline H Bridle

Excuse me! - excuse me! - excuse me!!! Yes it was that T.V. commercial that said...Pap Smears are the answer, Have one now, get one quick, and you won't get cervical cancer.

The Pills That Will Diane Merchant

The poem was written as a light hearted response to the magic of medication.

To Do With Flu Fred Moore

What's it like to go home sick, and try to rest, and your wife's TODO List is calllliinng yyyyyoooouuuuuuuuuu .......

Visit to the Dentist Joel Bjorling

I am queezy about seeing the dentist, yet there is a moment each year which always boils down to that dreaded visit. Will I become an X File?

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