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Be Warned! Some of the poems in this category could contain language that may be offensive. Read these poems at your own risk! |
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| Codgering | Darby O'Grady | |||
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Old men have daily schedules, too! |
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| Dear Santa | Robyn Scott | |||
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All I want for Christmas is a pair of nice young men, A football team . League or Union . I don't mind, ... |
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| Deliah | Topoke | |||
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I saw the light on the night that I passed by her window I saw her standing there alone dressed up in her smalls..... |
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| Eight Thousand Metres Up | David Peetz | |||
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What do men and women REALLY do in the 'mile high club'? |
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| God Created Woman | Author Unknown | |||
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Two beautiful legs, so long and so slender, Round, slim, and firm, and ever so tender ............ |
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| God's Gift | Sandy | |||
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There's one of these guys in every office, every pub, even in every supermarket.............. |
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| I Love Ya Darling | Author Unknown | |||
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Of course I love ya darling You're a bloody top notch bird And when I say yur gorgeous I mean every single word .... |
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| I'm Glad I'm a Man | Author Unknown | |||
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I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe. I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts. I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west..... |
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| La Femme Dentale | Roger Fraser | |||
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An alternative view on the pain caused by a trip to the dentist. |
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Male
Stripper |
Matt Haught | ||
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Does anyone else find it odd that male strippers even exist? |
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| MEN | Anita MacGillis | |||
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Can't live with them........ |
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Mulligan's
Missus 
(Ex Top Ten) |
Neil McArthur | ||
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Mulligan's missus was big, fat and mean A cruel and ugly man-killing machine She's the type of woman you'd be looking for If you wanted mercenaries for a guerilla war |
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| My Will I Write Before The Flight | Wally J Kenworthy & Mark Feldman | |||
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I have a fear of flying, Or anything to do with flight; Because of my anticipation, My will I sit down to write. |
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| Ode To A Mother-In-Law | Joe Earl | |||
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A face with a thousand wrinkles.... |
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| Of
Course I Love You
(Ex Top Ten) |
Janine Haig | |||
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How can you doubt that I love you? Didn't I marry you, eh? And though I don't say it too often, I show it in all sorts of ways..... |
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| Pennies From Heaven | Tony Strauss | |||
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Young boys get a kick out of seeing a girls underwear and will often try every trick in the book to do so. |
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| Politically Incorrect | Henderson Q. Goldfischer | |||
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This is it! Let the revolution begin. Down with too much 'Politically Correctness'. I wrote this poem as a parody on PC in answer to someone taking me to task for using a term of endearment all very, very innocent and funny I hope. |
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| Smouldering Sexy Sue | Topoke | |||
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I was only trying to be nice, but she wanted to get to know me just a little bit more. |
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| Square Dance Time | Topoke | |||
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Square dancing has become very popular in the past couple of years, so I think it is time that everyone gets up on the floor, and does it MY way! So take your partners by the hand and....... |
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| Supermodel | Attila the Stockbroker | |||
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Prepubescent imagery. Empty, stupid eyes. Waif thin. Tyrannical. No fat. No body hair. No character, no love, no personality - no brain..... |
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| The Boy's Prayer | Author Unknown | |||
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Our beer Which art in bottles Hallowed be thy sport ... |
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| The Bush Romantic | Mark Feldman | |||
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As I stick my sweaty arm up the vagina of a cow ... ... I think of your moist, warm lips ... and wish you were here now. The warm and friendly feeling of a cow turd on the ground ... ... Reminds me of your gentle warmth I feel all year 'round. |
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| The Fatuous Sex | Truthsayer | |||
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This is in response to "The Fairer Sex" by Choochyface |
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| The Girl's Prayer | Author Unknown | |||
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Our Cash Which art on plastic Hallowed be thy name ... |
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| The Handbag | Joe Earl | |||
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The handbag is a rare delight, it's like Aladdin's cave, All sorts of things are hidden there, that females like to save, .... |
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| Viking Blood | Larry Webster | |||
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It is greatly to my liking, To be a lusty Viking; Yes, that's the only life for me.... |
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| Woman with Attitude! | Author Unknown | |||
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I shave my legs, I sit down to pee And I can justify Any shopping spree..... |
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All
poetry is copyright by the individual authors.
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