Introduction

I was in a bowling alley one night and happened to observe a man and woman who were polar opposites in terms of relative size and girth. So I wrote a poem about where I believed their relationship was heading. From my collection "Yeah, they freakin'rhyme!"

Seltzer Sue

I started bowling Thursday evenings
With this gal named Seltzer Sue,
Gracious, what a big girl!
She could break a man in two

We talked a little and we laughed a lot,
As she jiggled in her clothes so tight,
And we fell in love between the beer and the cigarettes,
The spares and the strikes

We went strong for fifteen years,
'til the day of the accident,
She slid down the gutter with a chocolate bar,
And no one's seen her since

Sometimes when the lanes are quiet
And the boys a drillin' holes in balls
I think of how much I loved that girl
Cellulite and all

Copyright; E.G. Harne