Introduction

When I am online, I must get at least three or four strangers a day who pop up in instant message.(Usually teenagers who are bored and looking to have some fun) Some of them are quite obnoxous and insistant upon my giving them my personal information. This poem I dedicate to the online Instant message stalkers in all of cyberland.

The Instant Message Stalker

A pest Imed me today,
He emailed me too,
He asked if I were single,
and asked, how do you do?

He asked all kinds of questions,
wanted all the details,
of my very private life,
demanded that I tell,

Age, sex and location,
he insisted that I share,
along with exact sizes,
of my bras and underwear,

I politely said no,
refused all his requests,
I told him very sternly,
Stop this, don't be a pest,

His Im kept on poppin up,
he asked if I were wed,
by then I was quite annoyed,
by all the things he'd said,

I asked him which part of NO,
he didn't understand,
I told him I was 85,
and wore 6 wedding bands,

but all my husbands now were gone,
and I had all their money,
you want to know about,
their accidents now, honey?

I told him I fart when I walk,
the hair's gone from my head,
I keep my teeth in a jar,
at night I wet the bed,

Sometimes I wander nekkid,
till somebody brings me home,
you wanna get together,
so I won't be all alone?

Suddenly the Im's stopped
so I wrote him an IM,
a little sign then popped up
that said he was offline,

I giggled and I guffawed,
I chuckled and I laughed,
I doubt it seriously,
if my stalker will come back

Copyright; Elizabeth Lindberg
Email: DancesWiChickens@aol.com
Web Site:http://hometown.aol.com/eberg102/index.html